::Sunday Musings::

"Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men.  Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to teh end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life."

2 Nephi 31:20

Sunday, our lesson was on hope in Relief Society--and that's where I got the above scripture.  There is a girl in our ward, Tiffany, who is going through her second run of Chemotherapy for cancer I don't know anything about.  Anyway, she bore her testimony about her faith in Christ and she talked about how she appreciated those who had done so much for her even when they had their own problems and sufferings; she said we might feel bad for her because her trial is more noticeable on the outside, but that we shouldn't forget everyone has their own trials even if we don't see them.  You can't help but admire someone who says things like that while standing practically on tip-toe in her castes up to her knees, her voice sounding like its been damaged somehow from treatment, and her head all but bald.

I actually do remember one time she talked to me in Jr. High.  I have no idea what she said to me, I was just shocked that she actually spoke to me as though I was a real human being.  (Lets be honest here, some adults seem to have a hard time believing that children are humans too).  But I was just surprised because... she was a dancer and very pretty and most of the dancer-girls who looked like her would not want to hurt their self-image by being friendly to me.  I think media exaggerates the cliques and the unkindness of the preppy crowd--for the most part I thought the preps were decent people--they weren't so much mean to others--they just tended to ignore them, but I met multiple exceptions (like Tiffany).  It's kindof funny how I saw girls like that set a trend for their friends; like, it's actually pretty cool to be nice everyone?

Living in Costa Rica for three months has also reminded me of a girl I knew in Jr. High who had moved here from Japan.  She couldn't speak English.  She did not seem to understand anything that was going on EVER.

And everyone ignored her.  They didn't help her.  I think I was one of the only ones who ever talked to her, or was willing (sortof) to be her lab partner.  I liked her, she was sweet, but language barriers make this horrible wall between people mortared with fear and bricks of awkwardness.  People hate feeling stupid.  Decent people hate making other people feel stupid.  So when there's a language barrier--it seems like the safest thing to do is keep your mouth shut and close communication--that way--no one looks stupid.

But I regret it now.  I wish I had helped her.  I wish I had played a game with her and taught her the words of animals and classroom items.  I wish I had done more because now I've been in a place similar to hers, and my brother and sisters and mother ARE in the same situation.  You don't know how much a friend makes a difference. 

You would be amazed what you can understand, through patience and repetition and guessing--what you can understand without really understanding any words.  For example, Karla told me over and over again about five different ways that she wanted to stay at our house and get a ride to the English lesson that night and the only words I understood were probably familia, iglesia, venir, poder... inspiration fills in the gaps. 

The world is such a lonely place for so many people.